Release your need for control. Say to yourself the surrender frase:” May I have the surrender to accept the things that I cannot change. The courage tho change the things I can; and the wisdom to know the difference.” Wisdom recognizes that we can deeply love others, offer them assistance but in the end they must learn from themselves. Their happiness and suffering depend on their thoughts and actions, and not your wishes for them. Free yourself of this necessity, you will feel lighter.